How to Become a More Patient Person
Become a more patient person through mindful awareness of negative thoughts, increased acceptance of adverse situations, and compassion for others.
Give yourself enough time to slow down and be present in every situation and you will find that your tolerance for life’s troubles, both big and small, will improve.
Engage in Mindfulness
When it comes to being patient, mindful awareness means choosing acceptance over anger, according to professor Carrie Steckl in the article “Cultivating Patience in Everyday Life” on Mentalhelp.net. Reframe your mindset and be flexible in order to be more patient.
If you find yourself stuck in a traffic jam and your blood starting to boil, tell yourself “Keep calm. Being a little bit late isn’t the end of the world.” If a malfunctioning computer steals hours from your work day, acknowledge and accept that you will not get done as much as you had hoped.
Aim to reduce times of impatience by being mindfully aware of your feelings, and choosing acceptance when circumstances are out of your control.
If you find that your patience is lacking, use frustrating situations as chances to develop your ability to wait, write clinical psychologist Angel Adams and educator Patricia Papciak, in the article “How to Cultivate Patience.” Patience can be developed just like any other skill.
Examples of situations include long waits in line while shopping, being put on hold over the telephone, waiting for everyone else to arrive for a meeting, or spending time with small children. Any situation that has the potential to create aggravation can be used to develop more patience.
When you find yourself in these situations, reframe and take a lighthearted approach, write Adams and Papciak. Crack a joke while waiting in line. Read a book or plan your schedule for next week while waiting for a meeting. The more you practice patience, the easier it will come.
Lack of patience often goes hand in hand with blaming others for incompetence or ignorance writes psychoanalyst Jane Bolton in the Psychology Today article “Four Steps to Developing Patience.” Although it may sometimes feel like others are deliberately trying to cause you pain, often strangers are doing the best they can.
Perhaps the waitress who took forever to fill your drink orders is new to the job. The young children screaming in the grocery store may be tired and hungry. Instead of continuing to blame others, Bolton suggests moving beyond these petty complaints as a way of improving patience.
Value Your Time
Being patient does not mean valuing your time less. In fact, in many ways being patient means valuing your time more, because of the ability to be fully present in the moment, as noted by Adams and Papciak. Develop more patience in life by learning to say no and matching your responsibilities to the time that you have available.
Tell your friends “I just can’t fit that into my schedule” or “I don’t have time that day.” Making sure your schedule is not unreasonably full will make it easier to be patient in the moment. When you do spend time with others, give them your full attention and take pleasure in their company.
When you clean your house, do a thorough job rather than rushing through the task. Giving yourself enough time increases your ability to be patient.
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